Welcome
to the wonderful world of Stephanie Williams (well
okay maybe not that wonderful). Welcome to the semi-wonderful world
of Stephanie Williams (well maybe that's still a bit
too much). Okay, how's this?
Hey, all you moronic fudge-packers and disease-ridden sex kittens!
(Great , now you'll think I'm from Seattle). Well, WHATEVER, you've
stumbled across the most, unfocused, egotistical, web site for the
most worthless and self-serving record label since Paisley Park.
Yes kids, it's the one and (thank God) only Stephanie Williams. The word is out that the girl who runs makes the music (the self-proclaimed
Anti-Musician) is an overgrown trust fund brat. We understand she owns
several slaughter houses and she is also rumored to be involved in
the creation and distribution of pornography. She is also a loud-mouthed,
close-minded and arrogant tyrant who has been officially pronounced
legally braindead in three different time zones.
Anyway, it appears that the music making is really nothing but a pathetic
front for untold illicit and illegal operations. So then, welcome
to the nightmare world of Stephanie Williams, the
only place in all of indieland where you'll find a knife in your
back simply for uttering the term alternative.
Well, that will have to do as an introduction for now later when this
music making crap takes off running like a stripper in a leper colony
I can get some hot-shit writer to dream up some devastatingly cool,
and ultra-hip propaganda that'll make your head spin and have you
vomiting guacamole. Okay kids, so here we are; I've got the records
and you got your fat momma's big-ass chequebook. The logistics are
that you desperately need a bunch of my records to increase
your cool quotient among your useless friends and I need some mail
order action to keep up this facade I've created posing as an incredibly
pretentious but borderline happening musician. Now, I know there's
lots of records out there and we know you can only weasel so much
dough outta your mom but wouldn't you rather be supporting a label
fronting such important enterprises as the calculated murder and sales
of animals for human consumption and everyones life's blood, pornography?
I thought so.
So,
while I'm are aware that some of the other small musicians pretend to
put their heart and soul into the records they peddle, I'm being
totally upfront which should help me here at the Nerve
Center to gain your trust (no matter how misguided) and get you to
support my cause of bringing western civilization and possibly the
whole stinking world to it's proverbial knees. I hope you'll understand
that just because I'm in the slaughter and sex for sale game it
doesn't mean that I don't know about good music. The fact is I know
alot about it and my massive and, need I say, impressive catalog
proves it in hearts and spades. So, take a good long look at it (I
said a long look) and tell me there's a cooler entity out there than
Stephanie Williams.
I Dare
You!
STEPHANIE WILLIAMS
"a name you can pronounce since 1999"
"The
Greatest Trick The Devil Ever Pulled
Was Convincing The World That He Didn't Exist"
- Keyser Soze
a
couple fuckers with a healthy attitude
ben
blackwell ben blackwell
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The music business is a cruel
and shallow money trench, a long plastic hallway where thieves and pimps
run free, and good men die like dogs. There's also a negative side."
- Hunter S. Thompson
Past, Present
and Hopefuls
I've had untold comments concerning the
unfocused nature, navigation difficulties and the general junky appearance
of this website. Thank you for your concern.